Am I shallow/Asked out/Cindy says/I want your input.

Alright so, for those of you who don't know, Cindy a.k.a Cynthia is my best friend. She has been since year 10, she's the jack daniel to my ribs, the cotton to my candy, the sock to my sockS.
So.
Next wednesday I have a date, and I was tellin' her about it on the phone today. I was ranting on and on to her about how I suspect that one of the reasons this guy asked me was because he liked me which already puts us on different pages because I'm going because I want to get to know him [he seems so lovely so far] and in hopes that I can get a really good friend in this time [as mentioned before, single and happy]. So I continued to tell her how I don't mind going on this date but I'm going for different reasons to him & how I don't even know him well enough to know if I like him as a person and blah blah blah.
She then proceeded to tell me to shut up and that if I look at the bigger picture I should realize he's asked me out with him because he wants to get to know ME too and see if I have the qualities to become a great friend, NOT because he wants to slyly put his arm up my skirt in the dark or nothin' and I should realize the type of guy I'm dealing with.
I agreed.
She then just told me to see how everything flows and then after a few more conversations and time well spent at the cinema and when I see him around, I can then begin to assess. After some more small talk about the situation she goes to me. "Anyways, knowing you he would remain just friends with you anyway because you won't allow it to progress." I was like "what...SORRY ?!" because I knew what she was implying. She was touching on the string that she believes is my unshakeable shallowness.
I straight away began to argue my case, I was like "I'm sorry, but you can't be tryna call me shallow after you've SEEN the type of males I have gone for in the past, don't even try it my friend". I launched a full scale attack about how in the past I've gone for some males who have CLEARLY not been my type without giving a damn, so she can't tell me I won't let it progress because of things like how he looks, that the only time I got someone who was beautifulized in my books was the last time.
She stopped me by the time I got to that part and was like "YES ma. The last one was the one that has set the standard for what you will and will not allow now. Ever since him you've made it so that you've set your eyes on your type and if they're not your type then they'll only ever sit in the friend box. This guy [the guy I'm going out with on wednesday] isn't your type, so you'll be more reluctant to let it progress than if he was so don't even try argue".
I was almost stunned into silence. ALMOST. A part of me knew she was right.
I know what my type is... tall [above 6ft please], teddy bear-ish type build [basically the body type that means every time you go to hug them, you're receiving a bear hug], adorable in face, a lil "nerd-like" in dress sense [when I say nerd-like I mean Pharell type nerd], clean looking, nice facial hair and all that good stuff. I know I love a loud personality, a creative mind [preferably a music one too, but this is not a must] and someone who's not afraid to be different i.e break into song and dance with me in the middle of westfield and feel NO shame about it.
That kinda sums up my type, I hope I painted some nice pictures in your mind.
I know that if someone who were my type was to approach me, have a few conversations with me and ask me out to get to know me and enjoy my company, whether or not it would progress in future would definitely cross my mind more than once... now I'm not saying it would be the main focus but I wouldn't mind the thought because they check a lot of my boxes.
Someone who isn't my type may have to work a lil bit harder if they want to move into the "my future" category. That's just me being real. I don't like to think of myself as a shallow person, I'm not the type to completely shun a guy if he doesn't look or act the way I like, I'll always ALWAYS give them a chance and I'll always be friendly... it's just a bit harder for me to think about them moving into the future box if I feel like I'm not compatible with them in many areas. This more touches on the personality aspect rather than the looks aspect... I mean... I can't be there actin' a fool and you're jus' lookin at me smilin, no you need to JOIN IN. Compatibility is important to me and always has been, but the whole point of this blog post is to highlight the fact that in my mind I'm so set on "I just wanna get to know him as a friend, forget that other side first" whereas I know if the guy ticked the majority of boxes of my 'type' there would be a lot of "imagine if's" and "maybe's" running through my mind.
Can you imagine.
And I know I aint the only one.
I know after a while, especially as I mature, 'type' will begin to matter less and less and just how well I get on with them and how much of a great person they are to me will begin to matter more. This is something I know I need to aim at working on changing and I think the same goes for everyone.


But, does having a type make me shallow ? I mean... everyone has a type, it's not wrong is it ? Everyone has what they think their ideal husband or boyfriend will be like in their mind.... but I know this is something I need to do away with and throw in the bin.
Realistically, as a woman grows older her type begins to change and she begins to discover what she really wants in a man... being 20 I'm still quite young so maybe it'll change I dunno...


Thoughts please, tell me if I'm dead ass wrong or if I'm right in having a set type of man and holding the standard ! I've seen many women coming from both side saying things like "It's things like having a 'type' that'll stop you from truly being happy" and I've seen others say things such as "Know what you want in a man and don't settle for less, when you see what you want GRAB IT, aint nothin' wrong with havin' a type and stickin' to it to get the man you want".


I'd love to know what you guys think !


xoxo