Is it ever really worth the risk ?

So, yet again Christiana has written yet another inspiring blog post about "How to get over someone" and of course she had me doin' my "church nod" and "harmony hands" but she also got me thinking.
She raised a lot of good points about the time period it takes to get over someone, how everyone heals in their own time and how you just have to get on with it rather than thinking you should be over it too early on then getting frustrated when you're not [relapses are not the one].
However.
One point she had stuck with me and made me think. She basically said that when we're over it and we've dusted off our shoulders, we vow to never love again as hard and as wrecklessly as we did but as soon as the next mr smooth comes along all of that flies away like the wind. We find ourselves taking the risk and most of the time allowing ourselves to fall in love knowing that it could ever make us to break us, and I'm thinking... mate... is it really worth the risk ? Because more often than not, it's not.
See, I think it's foolishness to get into a relationship and give your all knowing full well it may not be permanant, but then at the same time if you never take the risk to fall in love with someone, how will you ever know if they're yours ?
It's all just so messy, because at the same time no one wants to be the bag lady who keeps all her walls up and refuses to love a perfectly good man properly because of the mistakes of the last fool, the problem is though how can we be damn sure that the person we're with is gonna bring us undeniable happiness ? things are ALWAYS rosy and beautiful in the beginning, but how do we know that's going to last ?
This is my problem.
I don't want to give myself away to someone who's on some dr jekyll mr hyde garbage and in the end I'm left with someone else havin' a piece of my heart in their pocket, it's not even that time of day out here. But I also don't want to miss out on someone special because of my fear of getting hurt and being left with nothing, it's all so beautiful to want to love with your all and really drown in the love of someone else, so what are we to do ? For someone like me who's single, this is torture, because you're forever scared, cautious and wondering. If a man is playing games it all eventually comes out on it's own, but the games always come out just when you're starting to get a 'lil excited and giggly about someone, there's only so many times you can take this happening before you decide to snap.
My whole thing is, not to put all my eggs in one basket until I see a ring, but sometimes even when you see a ring a whole lot of mess can still happen. All in all, you're always going to be hurt by the one you love, always, even when you're married, I think we just have to try and make sure we're being hurt by the right person and not permanantly damaged by the wrong one.

- xoxo

Neglect.

I'm so so sorry that I haven't been blogging for the LONGEST time. Best believe, my life has been crazy since I last dropped anything.
Family issues, school issues, issues EVERYWHERE.
I'm moving out on the 18th and I'm trying to be positive about the type of people I'm possibly going to meet, Lord knows my last halls experience wasn't the best. 
I'm overly excited about my course, I'm a lil' scared due to my lack of skill but I'm going there to learn right ? I'm looking forward to what I'm about to dive into anyway.
Also, I've decided to move away next year, but I'll discuss that more once I look into it.
My life right now is crazy, and no I'm not in a good place, but I'm trying.
The little things keep me smiling everyday, so as long as I'm still breathing I guess I'm taking each day one step at a time.


Oh. I also went to Houston, Tx and let me tell you the experience I had was enough to make me want to never go back ever again. It's not that I don't like Houston, the people are lovely and I've met some good people out there... but my auntie...well... boi...


Anyway, I'll make more of a conscious effort to post more, even though I'm on tumblr more something about blogspot makes me like <33333333


My hair's growing :o)


xo