I'm good.

Tonight me & my girl skipped down memory lane, but this time down my memories.

Every now and then we have a lil session like this, where we just sit back & laugh about our past stupidness & embarrassing behaviours but today we talked about something that had originally caused me pain.

I can say for the most part that I am extremely happy that I was able to laugh about it. This is a situation that for the longest while I'd refrained from talking about or mentioning with anyone nor had I ever gotten as deep into the memories as I did tonight. However today I went...well...almost all out [I say almost because we're tired now & need to sleep] so we had to cut it short at a certain point... but I had so much fun.

It was silly lol, and it was good to laugh about how silly I've been in the past when it came to my actions and my state of mind. I was nowhere near as angelic as I made out or people thought I was, I wasn't thinking or as wise as I thought I was at the time...& the way I seriously went all out...it was quite hilarious, so for the past hour it's just been pure giggles and "oh my gosh's" at my own stupidity.

The point of this whole blog is...I thought that in this situation I'd never be at a place where I could laugh about it the way I did tonight and it means a lot to be. Even though at the time I thought that it'd be too delicate for me to ever talk about as well as me thinking that I wouldn't ever be able to get over it, tonight proved me wrong. I was touching on areas I thought I'd long dusted under the rug or forced myself to forget, I was laughing about things that would've any other time brought tears to my eyes, all this shows me just how far I've come...because I don't hurt anymore even though the situation was so painful.

Fair enough, I still struggle for peace of mind sometimes, it's a shame how things turned out and there were certain parts that I seriously could've avoided but at the end of the day...now I'm laughing...and I'm glad.

I also wanted to use this as a time to encourage someone who's going through their own hurts and probably don't think they'll ever be able to come out of it & laugh about it. Trust me when I say you will, it may take a while...you'll cry a lot and for a while you'll be a brick but trust me, eventually when a person is fully able to let go of something & move on despite the outcome of a situation, eventually it falls into the category of things that are just the past. We're all human, we're all hurt, but as long as we're still standing we can move on.

Sending all my love

-xoxo