The big chop.

I did my BC today. Reason being because I was getting tired of transitioning because I couldn't even do it in an appropriate way, dealing with the relaxed middle/front and the regrowth on the sides/back was hard work.
So I chopped it all, I'm not exactly at my TWA stage yet but I'll get there.
The middle still has some straight ends due to the creamy crack but they'll grow out in no time and I'll just take them off with the next trim.
Do I like it ? Yes I do. I've gotten a lot of positive feedback and better yet this means a good 20 minutes is cut off from my getting ready time... good times ahead.


Day I did my BC: Saturday 6th Feb '10


Let's see where I am in a year :o)


xoxo

Have you forgotten that NOBODY is perfect ?

"If you have 12 fingers, flaunt those ten fingers like they were the most beautiful thing in the world & learn to love your insecurities, because God made no mistake when he put them on you" - Pookie.

I'm sorry people, but this rant couldn't wait.

So me & my girl stephanie [Read her blogs' .. www.herlifeandlyrics.com and www.ghanaiangeisha.blogspot.com ] were talkin' this evening about people who expect too much from others and how media has succeeded in hugely deceiving us into expecting to run into the impossible...the type of men/women that are sooo fine runnin' all up and through on tv.

This greatly pisses me off.

I don't get why people suddenly think it's okay to shoot people down for little things such as "Her feet are bigger than mine/his trainers are not on point/her hair isn't long enough" that's not having standards thats just down right shallow talk ; fair enough first impressions matter but little things like that are NOT enough of a reason for you to decide a person is not your time. My most favourite line I've been hearing lately is "I don't go for dark skinned males/females" and if you ask them the reason why they don't have one...it's okay to have preference, but you can't be ignorant forever, if a male or female...whatever their race/skin colour is good looking then you need to appreciate it, not pretend like they're not JUST because they are said race or skin colour. It's stupid.

I watch a lot of guys go on and on about how they think a girl should look and if certain girls don't look that way then they're not worth their time. I'm not surprised to hear that a lot of their descriptions are girls that are damn near impossible to find, they don't seem to understand that carrying this stupid mentality is what's going to keep them from finding anyone that's worth their while, the same goes for girls. If you're going to go around for the rest of your life with the mentality of "I'm not going to be with someone unless they look like *insert almost perfect description here*" then you're living in fantasy land, need to be swiftly slapped by reality and obviously hardcore lacking common sense.

Having standards and being SMART about your standards are two completely different things. Open your eyeballs, the women/men we see on TV have been airbrushed beyond measure, caked in make-up, possibly even sprayed/rubbed down with vaseline so that their skin is lookin' all glistening and what not...but on a normal day they're lookin' ORDINARY and HUMAN like the rest of us. These are two words that mankind need to get back in touch with. People forget that people are only human and are definitely going to have imperfections. You will never EVER find a man/woman who is perfect in every way and has the on par personality to match, it's NEVER done. We all have flaws in and out and it's time we began to accept this and be a little more open minded. The best looking person isn't exactly going to be the person that's going to love you the best...sometimes you may end up with someone a lil' bit lower than your standards and they may make you the happiest person on earth.

Trust, being ignorant and shallow will get you NOWHERE. If it's just because you're on some #OneNightStand or #JustABeat foolishness, then you'll be surprised when you're feelin' empty because you've had enough, the pretty faces are boring & you can't stand their conversation.

Ladies/gentlemen... if you find yourself getting rejected by a man/woman who has made such stupid comments about you don't feel discouraged, they probably weren't even worth half of you anyway. I used to allow the comments of others to greatly make me feel insecure, they didn't even need to be talking about me, just hearing a man I found attractive talk about what he finds attractive and finding that I didn't match that description made me feel very insecure. Made me feel like no one "worth my while" was checkin' for me lol. It took me a very long time to come to a place of acceptance in myself and how I look...I wouldn't say I'm 100% percent comfortable because it does take a good while to get there, but I'm well on my way. So if a person is talkin' about what he/she finds good looking and you find you don't match that description e.g "I like girls with small feet" yet you know you're a size 9, don't be discouraged, because someone will come along that will love ALL of you. At the end of the day you're stuck with yourself, imperfections and all, so you might as well learn to love you right ? No one should ever allow some ANY man/woman that obviously knows nothing about life to make you feel like you shouldn't look like you.

& that's me done for the night.

xoxo

P.S - WHO is shallow hal to be shallow anyways ?! If he was lookin' like taye diggs then YES I can understand...but since he's not...man needs to FALL.BACK. #NuffSaid.

MORE big changes.

Ok so today, I joined a facebook group called "care for your hair".

This group alone, after being in there for 10 minutes, was enough to convince me to finally make the decision of never relaxing my hair again.

I want a TWA [Teeny weeny Afro] ...I want one badly.

If you visit "sheacocoaluv" or "misskrisnew" on youtube you'll see soon enough my loveeee for TWA's...I was carrying one in a weave for a while early last year but now I wanna grow my own.

Relaxers has never really given me any problems [ except burn the hell out of my scalp on occasion and make my hair extra brown ] however, the problems it could possibly give me in the long run...I'm not willing to take the risk. I think it's time to bring my fro back but this time it'll be mine <3

I thank God my hair is already short, because then my transition stage won't be too long. I'm not sure whether or not I have to braid...or I even want to...it's too much work plus I don't mind walkin around with regrowth in my hair, I'm not that far from the stage where I can go do my BC [big chop] and go about my business. Yeah, I know, I'll have to invest a lot of time into my hair in the mornings and I'll have to be extra careful about the products I use, but I don't mind.

I've been considering growing out my hair natural for a whiiiiile, before I decided to start cutting my hair actually...& I was warned from one of my girls about the effects relaxer can have on your hair, but I was keen to experiment with short hair so I carried on. I've always been advised to just go natural, a lot of my girls have told me to do so in the past but I didn't listen cause I didn't think I could maintain it...but I think now it'll look nice, especially when I'm wearing my hoochies [hooped earings].

I'm probably gonna look like I jumped FRESH off the boat comin from Nigeria, plus the fact that for some time I'll be a bit limited as to what I can do to my hair...like I won't be able to do a frohawk until about a year later or something...but I can make it work for me.

Day I decided to stop using relaxer - 20th of January 2010

Let's see where I am this time next year.

xoxo

I love twitter/I Hate's.

I know a few months ago I said I hated twitter & that it was a waste of time & whatever...but ummm *looks around the room* I'm now slightly an addict. Cause of the "Uber twitter" application on my blackberry I tweet most of the day...it's fun :o) Lol plus I catch serious entertainment off other people's tweets & it's a good way to network, the thing that keeps me readily lovin' twitter though are the trending topics a.k.a TT's. My favourite one so far has been " #worstlies" I had a field day with that one...which brings me to my blog post.

Today I found the littlest things pissin' me off, upon thinking about them I came up with loads of lil' pet peeves & I wanted to TT all on twitter...but you only get 140 characters & it's annoying cause you can't really rant like you'd like...so I decided to blog about them..twitter style :o)

*clears throat*

#IHate - Racists. Whether you're racists to white or ethnic groups in general it's stupid. Get over it. The funny thing is if you ask racists WHY they hate that particular race 99.9% of the time they have no real reason. It's just pure foolishness. Prayer is needed.

#IHate - Religion bashers. How can you insult a God that you don't know ? How can you make such accusations about God when you don't know anything about him ? Take a seat, you're obviously confused about life. Whether you're in a religion, dont have one or believe that God is just "there", be respectful to those who DO believe in something, even if you don't believe the same.

#IHate - People who sit on the bus opposite me and pick their nose. It's disgusting. For goodness sake is the booger in your nose disturbing you SO badly to the point that you have to dig like you've never dug before up your nose hole in PUBLIC ? My God, please wait till you get home or at least out of my FACE & don't eye me up & down when I give you a dirty look because of what you're doing. It's nasty.

#IHate - Noisy "youts" on the bus. I know I used to be one of them..hell if anything I made the MOST amount of noise...but is what you're talking about SO exciting that everyone has to hear your conversation ? Hear one girl today "Truesay yeah my man's bloodset and my brothers cripset so that would make me half bloodset half cripset SICK ALIE"....I don't have anything to say in response to such foolishness.

#IHate - The conceited. I have expressed my dislike for them in a previous blog post so...yez.

#IHate - Closet gays. Bruv if you're gay let everyone know and live your life ! Don't go & live a lie get married have kids and then be cheatin' on your wife with Devon next door...allow the eastenders movement. It's not necessary...at all.

#IHate - Texts before 10am. If you know I'm gonna be at home how can you possibly think I'm going to be awake ? Unless I'm going somewhere or we have plans I do not RISE from my bed until 10:30am EARLIEST...so don't be textin' my phone & expect a reply until after 11.

#IHate - Guys who'll tell you they like you after a week of talkin' to you. Obvious rubbish, do I look like I was born yesterday ? Please carry that talk elsewhere. When you manage to gain some sort of common sense come back and talk to me.

#IHate - The ignorance of a person in love. I know it's inevitable and we've all been there...hell I've been there & I can probably be accused the MOST of this...but if a situation is clearly not good for you and you're crying more than your smiling because of someone that keeps CONSTANTLY hurting you...then no...that person isn't good for you and you need to BOUNCE. From when you can step outside the situation and look at it as "If my friend was in this situation what would I be tellin them" & know you'd be tellin them to leave, then you need to go.

#IHate - Man-hoes. You lot cause too many problems. Stop it. It's nazty.

#IHate - People who choose to live in ignorance. Now, because of an old friend I was once a big Zeitgeist fan but eventually not so much due to the fact that they don't support religion, but they raise some very good points, get your brain on. I'm not saying you must believe everything, but don't dismiss everything.

#IHate - Girls that choose to wear skirts/shorts with no tights in the DEAD of winter...ya mad ?

#IHate - Men who'll make women think that making a man wait for her is a madness...Ya mad ?! like I said man-skets are not the one.

#IHate - Materialistic individuals...simply because I don't really care about that stuff lol.

#IHate - When people feel that they have to lie to me to get to know me...come at me as you are & we'll give getting to know each other a try, if not then it just wasn't meant to work, it doesn't necessarily mean you have the problem.

#IHate - Falling out of love. It hurts and it's LONG.

#IHate - Bumlicks. [No Kendra-ings].

#IHateWithZEST - Natalie from bad girls club. Nuff said.

xoxo

I caved...

& joined formspring !!!

www.formspring.me/butterfly89

Ask me ANYTHING you want & I'll most definitely reply :o)...unless of course your question is one of pure jam foolishness...then you'd have to get airtime.

Lots of love

xoxo

Oh JAS SHARRAP you're not THAT nice.

Kay so, I have a lot on my mind since encountering the profile of a MORON. I have no idea how this is gonna come out but...here goes.

*Inhales*

Ok so I'm browsing through myspace [trust me myspace is DEAD, don't ask me what I was lookin' for] and I come across this dude. I won't even lie, this guy was fine with a capital F and he knew how to carry himself WELL, so I see the profile picture and I'm like "oouh !" but then I get to reading his "About me" section and it became obvious to me that I was reading the profile of someone severely lacking common sense.

Pure ignorance, arrogance and just plain STUPIDITY topped off with more than a dash of conceitedness. At that point I sat back and was like "WHAT IS THIS?!?!?!" I don't know HOW many people I've come across lately who've had the cheek to have this attitude. Yes. Fair enough you're good looking, you've got good hair WHATEVER that doesn't give you the excuse to act like you left your common sense back in your mother's womb. Conceitedness is such a bad habbit that needs to be BOUNCE. Yes I say habbit because nobody ever starts off conceited...it's something that builds up over the years by too many bimbo children bumlickin' a person or them having to forcefully convince themselves that they're the sh*t because they received too little attention from the female/male race. This guy was all talkin' about how he knows how no one is as live as him, about how he always gets "dark skinned niggaz wit inferior hair to him" hatin' on him because their hair isn't as good as his [ OH PLEASE. ] & how he knows he can get what he wants because he's so sexy...I'm like...spare me :|. He then had the cheek to add at the end how he's not conceited just very confident and he knows his worth...whereas what I got from his profile was a guy with no substance who relied on his looks to get him through life & unfortunately this was evidently the case. Girls couldn't get enough of this guy...cheap lookin' girls I won't lie but girls all the same, these were evidently girls with NO brain chasing after him but my question is even those girls who have no respect for themselves...after reading his "about me" why would you STILL want a guy like that ? What could you possibly find attractive about a man who talks about himself and other people in such a backwards manner ?

Now, let me go on record by saying I do not have a problem with people who are confident in themselves, know their worth and know who's worth it and who's not...but theres a little something called HUMILITY that people need to come to terms with, you need to humble yourself for yourself AND those around you...don't go on like an idiot just because some girl/boy told you yesterday they like your hair or whatever.

FIRST OF ALL. The first thing I want to address that has been gettin on my nerves is all this "Niggas be hatin/I got so many haters/Haters fall BACK" flex that people seem to be on. The word "Hater" is used EVER so lightly these days...but what most people don't understand is that nobody is hatin' on them, have they EVER considered that people just don't like them because their personality STINKS ON ICE ? I don't know HOW many times I've had to make this known to those loose lips that say people are hatin' on them when their actions are just nasty and backwards.

SECOND OF ALL. When a man/woman carries an attitude of "I'm better than everybody else" no matter how good looking they are they need to understand that it INSTANTLY makes them butters a.k.a frass a.k.a God was givin' himself jokes upon making you type frass. It's NOT attractive. There are some girls/boys that for some strange unknown reason LIKE the opposite sex being over conceited but I don't understand why. It's overpowering, a waste of time to be talkin' about yourself 95% of the day and no one gives a damn about whether or not yesterday some girl/boy begged to sleep with you while you were leavin' the club...do you hear ?! NO ONE CARES.

Bruv the last time I came across a guy like this I didn't even know him but I had to CUSS HIM [Don't judge me. I was immature, hurt and foolish...we all make mistakes and I said sorry lol] this dude was all postin 10second long videos on youtube of him lickin' his lips, talkin' about how so many girls are on his "jock", engaging in just some pure NASTINESS & postin' it up on the internet like anyone wants to see...& the way he was jus' so obsessed with his hair was FRUITY.

All I'm sayin is, actions like this get on my nerves probably more than ANYTHING. It's one of my biggest pet peeves for a person to go on THAT HYPE because some random any girls/boys told them they're sexy or whatever, there's just no excuse to start acting that way...at the end of the day if you have a personality that's shallow drip drip type shallow, then what are you left with ? What do you even have to hold onto ? I used to have a lot of fun lettin' these types of people know that they were NOBODIES...but eventually you're just left to feel sorry for them, because they'll never be able to truly appreciate anybody or anything.

We all know looks matter, we all would ideally want someone attractive and who our friends will look at and be jealous cause we've got someone nice on our arms...but the best lookin' person isn't exactly gonna love you the best & time has continually taught me that it's usually the "pretty" ones that bring the most trouble. I'm not saying don't aim high or have standards or whatever, but when push comes to shove it's not what matters above all else...especially if you're lusting after your DAMN self.

Ok I'm done

xoxo

Happy new year my loves'.

I drew this earlier on in the midst of my relaxation time...ahhh *sips my cranberry juice* so I thought I'd share it with you guys :o)

I'll be back with my goals & resolutions soon

xoxo