A random word of advice.

To all my ladies out there...
If you ever come across a man who says to you the following lines:


"I don't deserve you" - [NOT "How did I get so lucky", that's different.]
"I don't wanna hurt you/ I'm scared I'll hurt you"
"You're too good for me"


FLEE.
FLEE like you've never FLED in your LIFE.
I'm being serious as hell !! Experience has taught me and I've learned from too many that when a man says that, he genuinely means it and there is a 9 out of 10 chance that by the end of the "love story" your gonna be left crushed. It's either said man is a pathological liar, he's cheating, he has a history of cheating, he doesn't really know himself and needs to get to know himself...I dunno...but it always means something is definitely wrong. He's crying out for something and you need to listen and find out what that something is because there is a deep underlying PROBLEM for you and for him.
Sometimes the man can tell you what that problem is, sometimes he can't in which case he needs to search/check himself, you can help him do so, but I would advise you to do it from the "friend" bench otherwise you'll end up gettin' cut up on the inside and trust me it's not even that time of day.
Sometimes however, the man will also tell you this because he needs you, he needs you to help him sort out his damn self & in such cases whatever it is he needs you to do for him emotionally/mentally you need to do without loosing your peace of mind in the process. 


Being there for somebody...loving them more than you love yourself, it's not an easy job, so if you're just about ready to pass your heart over and you hear those words, hold up the red light & find out the ways in which your honey man needs to fix up.
That is all.


xoxo

I tumble over.

Tumblrrrr had to eventually get some love too.


www.natureal-music.tumblr.com


<3

Do you REALLY care what skin tone they are ?

Again, another conversation quite nicely provoked this blog post, I went on a full blown rant by the end of it, so I was encouraged to blog about it.
Now...I have quite a few things I wanna bring up under the topic of "interracial dating". Anyone who knows me knows I've always been a fan, I think it's beautiful when you see people of completely different races walking hand in hand, not just the typical "black male, white female" couple but "black female, asian male" type couples, they bring big smiles to my face; however in the ignorance of today's society not everyone feels the same, so I have a few things I wanna touch up on whilst making my point known.


1. The "Darkskin VS Lightskin" topics.
I cannot believe...in all honesty how long this stupidity has been going on for, the question I always find myself asking is "No but seriously doe WHO CARES ?!" because I know for a damn fact that I don't. Light skinned or dark skinned at the end of the day it's SKIN TONE, to say "Light skinned people look better than dark skinned people" and vice versa is absolute madness ! Not only is it over generalizing but it's just pure foolishness. Have you seen ever light skinned/dark skinned person in the world out there to make an assumption like that ? HELL NO so what's the DEAL ? honestly I'm so BAFFLED sometimes when I see trending topics on twitter talkin about such stupidness, bare debates on facebook, bare debates in college about "Has light skin gone out of fashion ?" WDF ?! How can you even begin to say that ? Since when is it fashionable to be a certain skin colour ?! Look yeah...at the end of the day NO ONE CARES. I have come across some of the most BEAUTIFUL dark skinned AND light skinned individuals, in my state of CORRECT thinking I will never over generalize and say one tone looks better than the other because it's so damn fool, skin tones are beautiful and different for a reason. Get off that rubbish it's 2010.


Sidebar: All such individuals who think they're hot cakes BECAUSE they're a certain skin tone are not excused either. I sit back in awe when I hear girls/boys talking about how they know they can get any guy they like because of their skin tone...seriously ? Shut up, sit down, close your mouth then go home. Such ignorance is needed here...bare foolishness.


2. Preference and ignorance shouldn't be in the same sentence.
It's okay to have preference, I have more than once on this blog expressed that. To say that you prefer a certain race/ look over another is fine, but when you then become ignorant about said preference is when there's a problem. Comments like "Sorry I couldn't ever be with someone who weren't dark skinned choc'lit scrumdillyumptiousness" is mad... I've heard a girl utter those exact words and then a year later her mouth was shut NICELY when she found herself chasing after some vietnamese boy in her college. You can't be ignorant. Beauty/good looks doesn't fall under ONE category, you get good looking people in all races and you have to acknowledge that, you can't shun a girl/man who's absolutely breath taking in the looks department AND their personality is on P just because they aren't your first choice of preference in race, it's ridiculous and it's stupidity like that that'll stop you from ever finding real happiness. Stereotypes and over generalizing don't belong in the mind, so get rid of it and keep the mind open to new possibilities. 


3. Mindset.
Keep your mindset fresh, I've said this from day one. If you're broken, fix yourself...yes fix yourself. Seek help where you need it [Church/The counsellors office/Rehab] re-evaluate yourself and know what you want. Oh, while you're doing so also weigh up the things that matter and the things that don't matter. Whether or not a girl's ass/breast is big enough, whether her hair is long enough or whether she's thick or tall/short won't make you happy when push comes to shove, skin colour let alone looks won't be the thing bringing you true happiness at the end of the day, yeah sure your wife/husband will be eye candy but we all know that that isn't enough. I've always said that the best looking person isn't necessarily going to be the one to love you the best, if a woman/man loves you for who you are, satisfies your needs, can hold it down for you for the rest of your days, supports you and your dreams/compliments your dreams,be all you could ever need, your best friend AND partner in crime, then what more is it that you're lookin' for ? I aint sayin' go marry a woman/man that looks like Nanny Mcphee/Shrek and disregard physical attraction completely...but it's not the most important thing. If a person can really be all you've ever needed and satisfy your mind, heart, body and soul for the rest of your days then what else do you WANT ? If you turn down such a person because they don't seem to meet your supposed "criteria" in the looks department or they're not a certain race then shame on you, SHAME I tell you.




I've always loved my hispanics, my asians, my liteys, my whites and any others among lovin' choc'lit men. I'll never discriminate on the type of man I want to be with just because of his skin colour, you really don't get to experience a nice slice out of life if you do. I'm lookin' for a man that can love me in the way that I need to be loved and I know his skin tone aint gonna hinder that...all stereotypes and hear-say out the door, I know what I want, I know what I prefer but I'm not limited to my preferences at all.


To all of you who are reading this, what say you about interracial dating/ the issue of the light skinned/dark skinned debate ?


I have a lot of friends who disagree with me on certain areas of these issues, we're all allowed to have an opinion...but no ignorance...ignorance gets airtime.


xoxo

So..

I wake up this morning. I co-wash. As I get out the shower I'm surprised to see a lil' curl pattern comin' through.





I dunno if you can see it...but I can :o) I'm excited.


xoxo

Change in URL

Hey people,


I've had a change in address, it had to be done, as my old one was just...crazy as hell.
It's now www.natureal-love.blogspot.com
There's ALSO been a change in my twitter account too...it's now www.twitter.com/fullofdreamsxo


xoxo

Trending topic...

How did I love you ? I ask myself... but there was only one way I knew how to love you. I'm not in love with you, but I do still love you enough to care.
For an hour you made me feel like you completed me, for thirty minutes you chose to make me feel like a princess, for fifteen minutes you listened to my problems and never once complained, for five minutes you told me how much you loved me... but you lied to me for a year.
Despite this, I still do love you, not in love with you, but I do love you. I care enough to ask how you are, I'm reckless enough to still want to talk, I'll say hi even though I won't get a reply back... it really shouldn't matter, I really shouldn't care, but I do.
You're my worst nightmare come true, my biggest fear personified... forget all the lies and the backwards way you chose to seek attention, the scary part is that I really...for real have no idea who you are, absolutely no idea, the truth could be anything no matter how worrying, yet despite this I still seek it.
I wanted to tell you that I forgave you for what you did. I wanted to ask you what it was that drove you to think you had to do what you did instead of just be yourself, I wanted to know what you're always so scared of because with me you didn't need to be afraid.
I want to thank you for the times when you made me feel like the luckiest, greatest, most loved and cherised woman on earth, because they're the things I'll hold onto forever. I want to thank you for all the times you listened, all the times you asked me "Tell me a story" despite knowing I was going to talk complete nonsense, I have no idea how you felt about me, the things I said or just how genuine you really were, but for a little while you made me feel like I mattered more than anything which was at the time what I needed.
When I fell for you at first, believe it or not your looks had nothing to do with it, yeah I was very immature and my words probably said otherwise but your looks didn't come into it...not once...not really, if they did the day I found out the truth would've been the day my feelings were flushed down the toilet, but it took me almost a year to rid myself of any romantic feelings I felt for you.
If I ever did/said anything to make you feel otherwise, then I do sincerely apologize. I know some of the things I said to you I can't take back because the fact is I said them, but I do want to apologize and hope you can forgive me for them.
I'm not ignorant enough to know that despite your actions you're still every bit as human as I am. Your silence speaks louder than anything you've ever told me and I've had to accept the fact that things are this way. I tried to understand you, but how could I possibly when I never really knew you ?
Our situation has left many unanswered questions, many words left unsaid and a book with no ending in the bookshelf of my life, but maybe the ending has been written and I'm the one that keeps checking back to see ? I don't know...
I have no idea what you feel now or what was on your mind then... the part of me that likes to hope likes to think I did know some of you, but when it boils down to it I knew nothing...the parts of my personality you did manage to grasp weren't exactly the best, I didn't really know myself then & I'm not the same person, but I bet everyone says that.
There's so much I wish I could say, and sometimes the side of me that cared for you the most wishes I could talk to you one last time, but wherever you are and whatever your doing is part of your life...I'm now living mine. I was able to come to accept this as a learning experience and move on.
I don't hate or resent you, truth is I never did...underneath all the hurt, anger, lies and bull I couldn't bring myself to hate you...you breaking me allowed me to be molded into something better, it's from this I found the strength to be able to let go.
I hope life is treating you kind...I really do. I've sent a million emails like this in the past, not really meaning it as much as I mean it now.


Thanks for callin' me "cookie face"


xoxo




- To all my readers...I know this looks really REALLY confusing, but this is something I felt I had to do. I'll never really get the chance to say to this person in question all I want to say to them, so I figured here was the next best thing really to express it...I'm sure there's loads I've missed out, and I know I haven't exactly worded it the best but...it's the best I could do at 2am on codeine excited about being baptized the next day soo...yeah.
I would encourage anybody who's ever been heartbroken by anyone to do this. I'm not saying write it and make it a blog post but to anyone who's ever been heartbroken especially the FIRST time needs to write a letter to their first love...one they don't intend on sending...but sending it anyway. The trending topic "LetterToMyEx" was on twitter a few days back and there was so many things I could say...at first all negative but really...what's the point ? So like I did with my "IHate" post I made it a blog post instead.  The person I wrote this to would probably call me an idiot for writing this as I doubt they care, but I did this for me not them. This person wasn't exactly my ex, but they were the closest thing I've ever come to an ex and love, I long moved on from this situation and make a hell of a lot of jokes about it nowadays, but it doesn't excuse the fact that it happened. I chose to make it a blog post because....yeah that's where I essentially started writing it lol so I thought I might as well post it no ?
To all those checkin' into the heartbreak hotel...be strong. More importantly allow yourself to feel everything, because with sorrow and brokenness comes wisdom...every tear, lost memory and relapse counts...so just hang in there.


xoxo

I just wanna say to you guys...

Thank you all so so much for reading, commenting & everything.
It makes me smile to know that people actually read the rubbish that I talk about, even though half of the time it doesn't make sense or it's completely random, you guys still show your love anyway.


Love you all plentyful






xoxo